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I don't know what good this will do because I didn't follow the last one, but let's give it a whirl.

To do:

  • HOWL 2.2 (really need to finish this motherfucker)
  • Voting Incentives
  • Audio chaps for youtube
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Things I'd like to work on today:

  • HOWL 2.2
  • Subfic (subscriber fiction)
  • Voting Incentives
  • Some traditional ms work
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So, as I mentioned, I finished my first book yesterday. Unfortunately I cannot tell anyone in my family about it. Why's that do you ask? Simply because it has gay content in it and I'm not out to most of them. Ah, I can hear you say, but isn't the solution to that problem easy?

No. No it is not. I know the closet is self-defeating, I know that it's hurting more than just me, that there's this huge chunk of my life that I can't ever share with them. I know that, really. But the thing is? I'm not all that upset about it. Oh sure, I'm frustrated and mad at myself, but not enough to rock the boat. The status quo may be flawed, but it's working for me right now.

But of my problem is, I'm not a big risk taker. I'm not coming out to my parents until I'm absolutely sure I have a place to say if things go south, just in case. Not that I expect them to take it badly, but it's just too much of a biggie to worry about. Can't be homeless, after all. The closet is a lot more complicated than the gay party line says it is. It's not about shame, it's not about self-flagellation, and while there is some fear involved, it's not really about that, either. For me, it's about caution, and having all my ducks in a row.

Maybe they'd be cool with it, maybe they wouldn't care...but what if they did care? It's just too much to think about, to process. My fragile human mind can only handle so many what-ifs at a time. Better to let this one happen as it happens, I think. At least for now.


Dec. 29th, 2009 10:33 pm
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So I finished my first book today. Cat Valente said something like whenever she finishes a book she expects confetti to rain from the ceiling and is always disappointed when it doesn't happen.
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Anyone who has ever read anything of mine, now you can vote for me on Sure, it's for my original fic and not for fanfic, but that's okay. Send a little goodwill my way, anyways, please.
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I covered a song, found some stock images, and made a video! Yes, that's me singing, which I'm sure you can tell by how shitty it sounds. But listen with headphones and the song itself sounds pretty cool, I think.

I know it's not perfect, some of the text is too small, for instance, but I'm way proud of it nonetheless.

Anyway, this is a promo for my original fiction project Dead Boyfriend. Let me know what you think, good, bad, or otherwise.
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Made up a little progress today. And two percentage points!

6148 / 50000 words. 12% done!

Go me, I'm awesome.
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Well, I did write a few more words, but it wasn't even enough to raise me a percentage. >_<

4994 / 50000 words. 10% done!

However, 4994 is a cool number, so I'm putting up regardless.
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Okay, dropped the ball the last few days, but wrote two side stories today so made up some progress.

4821 / 50000 words. 10% done!

Still have some tinkering to do on the second one, so the word count may change slightly before the day is out.
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I'm doing this weird thing this year. I'm doing NaNoWriMo. Kind of. Except for the part that what I'm doing has nothing whatsoever to do with NaNoWrimo. I'm hoping to write 50,000 words by the end of November, yes. But I'm doing it as a running total of everything I write between now and then, with the incentive to sit and write every day. Some of the words will be from Dead Boyfriend, and others will be from other projects, short stories, etc. Oh, and I started today instead of on the first.

Yeah, like I said. Nothing like NaNo at all. Anyway, here's my progress so far:

1275 / 50000 words. 3% done!

Nothing earth-shattering but not bad for a day's work. And I may yet pick away at things. Who knows.
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If you're on my friends list, and thus reading this, it's probably because you enjoyed something that I've written. The something was probably one of my completely smutty fanfics, and I am unbelievable thrilled at that.

But I'd like to take a moment to pimp my original fiction Dead Boyfriend. As you can probably guess from the title it stars a young vampire hunter who finds himself startlingly attracted to a strapping young vampire. Complications, comedy, and carousing ensue.

It's got gays, swords, and violence, with a bit of plot on the side for those that are picky like that. So please take a look, I think you'll enjoy it. And if you do, tell your friends.

Actually, tell your friends if you hate it, too. Maybe I'll get lucky and they'll like it.
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I have come to the realization of why chapter one was burning my ass so badly. I now know what it needs to work, and the best part is it won't even take anything drastic. Just a little extra added to Regan and Milly's conversation.

I believe the reason this little brain-blast occurred to me is because I'm a little more in editing mode this week. I printed off the first five chapters just a few minutes ago with the intent to go through with a pencil and tighten up the language, so I guess just putting myself in a different mindset made me see what wasn't working. Sometimes that's all it takes, thankfully. A major rewrite won't be necessary--at this point, anyway.

Can't let myself get so far into editing that I kill the muse for this week, though. I still need to whip up my side story. But I don't think that will be a problem, since I need to make some editing decisions on how I'm going to do the side stories from here on anyway. Everything will work itself out, I just have to stay on track and stay positive. Pushing oneself too far can kill the inpsiration. Forcing out the words works for some people, but not for me. So stay on track, but don't be afraid to fold up the map and just wing it sometimes.
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I'm feeling like I should hit the table of contents and read back over my whole story just to make sure I haven't gotten off track or lost the flow of things somewhere, and the only way you can do that is to start at the beginning and hit go. But here's the thing. I hate chapter one. I really do. As far as requirements for first chapters go it barely hits the minimum, introducing people and showing us a bit of Regan's personality. I'm not sure there's anything technically wrong with it, I just don't like it.

So the obvious thing to do, then, would be to start at chapter two and hit go. I'm not sure my OCD would allow that, but I guess I could give it a whirl. What I really need to do is sit down and brainstorm what exactly I want an improved first chapter to look like, but in order to do that I'd have to put into words just why the current chapter one is bugging me and I'm not sure that I could. There's just this sense of "wrongness" about it to me, in some vague, ill-defined authorish way.

Maybe I could hit up the other writers on my friends list and pick their brains. That might not be a bad idea actually.

In other writing news, I need to decide what I'm going to about the side story this week. I had a plan about doing a little mini-story in sequential order, but I'm not sure that will be feasible. The stuff I need to come across might be over and done with in the main narrative by the time the side story catches up. Which wouldn't necessarily be a bad thing, I guess. More background details to flesh in, while the absolutely imperative stuff has already passed on. I dunno, we'll see.

My whole process is very experimental, as you can probably tell. I've never made it this far in one of my projects before. The only ever thing I've come close to was in one of my previous projects that I churned out 28 chapters of. I only worked on that for maybe two months before I burned out on it. I've already been working on this for over 6 months, 24 weeks plus however long it took me to write up to chapter five before I started posting online.

It's not a stellar amount of progress by any means, but it's a record for me. Small victories, folks. Small victories.
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Focused Regan is also a little scary. Sexyscary, is that a word?
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I posted an audio-only video of myself reading chapter one of my original work Dead Boyfriend on youtube. Check it out.

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I was adding up the word count on each chapter to get the average of it (just for kicks) and the combined total of chapters one and two was 3000 words exactly. O_o

Total word count so far is 15,196. Chapter average is roughly 1381. At least as of right now, but the word count on chapter eleven is still liable to change slightly between now and Monday.


May. 5th, 2009 11:53 pm
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What's this? Two chapters finished in one day? Maybe my muse is trying to make up for yesterday.
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I have my very own listing for Dead Boyfriend at the Web Fiction Guide and their sister site Novels Online. I submitted it a couple days ago, but it was just listed today and already someone has seen the listing and commented because of it. Glee! Hopefully this is a portent of things to come.

Also, I really should shell out the money for more icons. I have no happy ones.


Apr. 14th, 2009 05:20 pm
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I wrote 1942 words and finished two chapters today. I think that's the most I've done on something that wasn't fanfic in a long time. Feels good. And I might poke away at it some more, yet.
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So, all ye various peeps on my flist who are fans of my writing, just dropping a note to let you know about Dead Boyfriend. It's the gay vampire hunter story I was talking about in my ranty post about vampires.

Just be warned, it gets pretty graphic at times. There's a sex scene that takes up the entirety of chapter three. Yeah, I didn't waste any time. Only chapter one is up so far, I haven't sussed out what the update schedule will be like yet.


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